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Are You The Farmer started the mayhem in their own inimitable style. Tesco and Blair (amongst others) took a surrealist kicking and we laughed our arses off - it was a great start to a great night.

dontstayin.com

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Are You The Farmer? kicked off the night with their unique poetic musings and Bristol loved them. Laughter and insight in abundance, beautiful sounds and the strangest, funniest game of bingo you can imagine. Thank you guys, you were great.

dontstayin.com

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Are You The Farmer? are the best thing ever. They are better than cheese and biscuits and ham and eggs and everything else that isn't Are You The Farmer. Are You The Farmer could and would win Chuck Norris in a dub poetry throwdown stylee.

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I hated poetry, I mean it's just words, and as a News of the World reader I fully supported their campaign to have anyone practicing poetry burnt and then deported. However after passing out in a club recently where Are You The Farmer were performing, well, their words filled my subconscious. Since then I've taken up unicycle, have grown an extra brain (called Derek) and haven't stopped smiling. Are you the farmer are officially the best thing in the world and have changed my life.

 I now think they should only be burnt.

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Can mind-control be achieved by simply placing one's hand at the exact centre of the forehead while wiggling all five fingers in the general direction of your subject?  Almost certainly (although it's tricky to pull off in court). 
Now we speak as one.  And we say that Are You The Farmer? rule.

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How weird, I missed the last performance of 'AreYouTheFarmer?' but ever since that night I have had a unicycling brain imaginary friend who sporadically appears and smiles at me.  He's called Alan though... but he did appear yesterday and burn a Daily Mail reader, which looked fun.  So my suggestion for a quote would be:

Are you the Farmer are so good they induce smiling-unicycling-brain imaginary friends that promote the burning of Daily Mail readers.

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Being a successful business person I was recently on my was to a very important meeting (to discuss how we could increase flange production by over 20% given current market conditions). I was wearing my favourite cornflower blue tie.  Whilst driving through Exeter I became very lost and desperate to get to my meeting on time I stopped to ask for directions. Unbeknown to me the first people I saw were Are You Farmer. I asked them if they could show me the way to the A4372, they ended showing me how to achieve inner piece, increased my wood witling speed by 20% and then to top it all opened up a rift in the space time continuum allowing me to travel back in time and punch the parents of Shakira squarely in the face.

We are the farmer are not just best thing ever but offer an incredible sense of value. I've now ditched all my consumer based possessions, no longer wash and have been living in my pants ever since.

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Are You the Farmer: tastier than a three cheese sandwich with the bread removed and replaced with two slices of cheese, and s e xier than Stephen Hawking wearing a strap-on Einstein.

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‘Being blind, deaf, Agoraphobic and a Fundamentalist Christian I have never seen, heard or been near Are you the Farmer.  I was however outraged by their lewd behaviour and dub poetry and so complained to Des Lynam. He gave me £20,000 , built me a bigger house and arranged for Are you the Farmer farmer to visit three times a week and trim my privet. I now think they're better than the baby Jesus and only half as hairy!'

'As someone who doesn't know anything about Poetry is can seem like a dirty word, Are You the Farmer clean it up, make it thought provoking, make it filthy again then give it back to you. I'm hooked!'

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“Having at last witnessed the mighty ‘Are You The Farmer?’ and seen what all the fuss is about, I find myself somewhat at a loss when trying to write a comment that is both clever and witty enough to do them justice.  So I won’t.  B*llocks to the lot of you.  Get a proper job you bunch of hippies, and stop asking so many f*cking questions.”